The New Rules

 

These rules for the Mid-City New Year’s Eve Bonfire came to me via Pat Jolly’s list, not from a direct source, so I can’t verify their origin, but the writing makes me think they came from the Mid-City neighbors who negotiated with the NOPD and NOFD:

Bonfire Guidelines

Here are the guidelines for this year’s bonfire. These rules are what we had to agree to with the NOFD, NOPD, and Parks and Parkways. If you want to see this tradition continue, please adhere to the guidelines. If people fail to do so, it will be grounds for revoking our permits.

No Fireworks
In or around bonfire
City Ordinance No. 123-45.a
The N.O.F.D. will extinguish the fire immediately if fireworks are tossed into the fire. If you want to see this tradition continued, do not throw fireworks.

Do Not Throw Items in Fire
Designated marshals & fire personnel only can place items in fire

No glass containers

Respect
Respect the barricades, volunteer marshals & the NOPD & NOFD

Be Nice or Leave
This is a family-style neighborhood event. Please behave accordingly.

Do Not Litter
Please take your trash with you when leaving

At the risk of beating a dead horse, things we one did without incident are now forms of misbehavior. Not only that, but disrespect for the authorities and unkind, un-family friendly activities are now potentially actionable. Also notice that no glass containers are allowed, which means no champagne for New Year’s Eve. 

I look at this list and keep thinking we’ve saved the corpse but lost the life that was once inside it.